I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
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