hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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