White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
