The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
