My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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