If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
