So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
