i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Edward fifth and chaser hands
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
