wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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