maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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