i want to fuck
it's pretty self explanatory
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
These 23 People Had Crazy Sex With Complete Strangers
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
23 Medical Examiners Reveal The Most Disturbing Causes Of Death They’ve Seen
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.