i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey