North Korea, Best Korea!
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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