Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Just high enough for therapy.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
