So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize