If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
there is puke in my bra ... again
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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