Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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