guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
