So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
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Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize