No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
