I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
operation harelip BJ is a go
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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