I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
