It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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