I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Randomize
