Sponge bath it is.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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