It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
