i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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