i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
So squirting runs in the family.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
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