She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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