We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
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