That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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