Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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