I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Randomize
