I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
