I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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