Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
