So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I need a beard to bite.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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