we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
When are your genitals available?
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
