My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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