ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
we're making bets on your personal life
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
