she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.