Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
