Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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