4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
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