I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
