I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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