in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
be right there i have to get my cape
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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