I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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