marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
do nipples grow back?
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
