i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
