Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.