Texts From Last Night

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  (317): View more from Indiana

  I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.

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  (317): I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best. http://tfl.nu/9ej5
  Replies (32) Good night (2849) Bad night (3147)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...

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  (713): well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer... http://tfl.nu/85fe
  Replies (22) Good night (3597) Bad night (746)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her

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  (318): I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her http://tfl.nu/587c
  Replies (5) Good night (623) Bad night (4332)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.

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  (304): he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding. http://tfl.nu/d3lt
  Replies (26) Good night (6084) Bad night (779)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.

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  (847): Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels. http://tfl.nu/hv8u
  Replies (13) Good night (7098) Bad night (1103)
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  (712): View more from Iowa

  I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night

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  (712): I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night http://tfl.nu/v3fw
  Replies (20) Good night (3776) Bad night (1657)
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  (276): View more from Virginia

  I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem

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  (276): I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem http://tfl.nu/0t83
  Replies (6) Good night (3535) Bad night (1060)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.

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  (902): Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog. http://tfl.nu/wgn2
  Replies (5) Good night (2031) Bad night (917)
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  (909): View more from California

  Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?

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  (909): Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs? http://tfl.nu/7n3l
  Replies (8) Good night (1591) Bad night (591)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.

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  (704): I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes. http://tfl.nu/6fin
  Replies (5) Good night (820) Bad night (560)
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  (914): View more from New York

  DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD

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  (914): DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD http://tfl.nu/a868
  Replies (3) Good night (855) Bad night (255)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.

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  (614): Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane. http://tfl.nu/2bgv
  Replies (6) Good night (1480) Bad night (241)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital

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  (613): Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital http://tfl.nu/nh6p
  Replies (8) Good night (1476) Bad night (322)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity

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  (317): Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity http://tfl.nu/wsrq
  Replies (0) Good night (340) Bad night (195)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning

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  (412): Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning http://tfl.nu/oois
  Replies (4) Good night (356) Bad night (308)

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