she looked like the before picture.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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